Gap

You spend all your day trying to think.

You have to analyze all possible paths, routes, bridges and walls.

You must make decisions for your life.

You look around you.

You realize you are alone.

You feel lonely.

You go out for a quick walk.

You meet some people.

You call them friends.

You like their company.

You hope that you will feel better.

You will forget.

You try to communicate.
You pretend.

You know that.

You present your usual icon.

You are fine and happy.
You try to hide your fears.
You hate yourself for doing this.

You need to speak.
You decide to be brave.

You know these are your friends.

You have chosen them.

You love them.

You trust them.

You do? 

You don’t know exactly what you feel.

You are confused. 
You know deep inside. 

You use them to fill your empty moments.

You want to change this.

You want to come closer.

You want them to know.

You want them to be part of your life.

You open your mouth.

You try to say something.

You freeze.

You hide anxiously your frightened intention.

You have lost the chance one more time. 

You face terrified the dark side of yourself.

You feel so ashamed.

You can not share anything with them.

You prefer to stay speechless.

You prefer to hear them.

You want to be invisible, safe.

You feel exhausted knowing the truth.

You are loosing the fight with your mind. 

You face your worst nightmare.

You have lost your identity.

You can not share your thoughts.
You can not present your heart. 
You have one?

You believe no one can help you.

You are afraid of others' reaction.

You see yourself as a reflection of their ghosts.

You feel that your emotions are all that you have.
You think that speaking may destroy their potential.
You are terrified that their and your words will haunt you.

You feel beaten, defeated.

You are too weak to admit it.

You do not dare to expose yourself.

You don’t want to destroy the face you have created.

You soon realize that you are alone.
You have no friends.
You are noone among them.

You can not trust anyone.

You live just for yourself.

You suddenly realize something that terrifies you worse.

You do not dare to speak to yourself either.  

You have just rejected this silent speechless friend too. 
You feel sad. 

You understand that you have to deal with it. 

You know the secret.  
You look forward to it. 
You return back home. 

You open your laptop.

Here you are again.

Secure in your couch.

Spending time.
Thirsty behind your screen.
Ready to confess to those that don't know you.
Those that you will never meet.
Those that accept you.
The way you present yourself.
You trust them more than anyone.
You depend on them.
You are addicted.
Safe among the unknown.
You are happy in your virtual life.
And you hate your real one.
You feel peaceful.
Alone.
Behind your miserable mask.
Away from your real friends.
Avoiding to think.
Avoiding to live.
Relaxed in your familiar dark and silent room.
You look for yourself.
You are absent.
In the gap you created.

Wake up! your instict shouts. 
Honor your life trip! 
Get up! 
Go out there!
Meet your real friends!
Make them friends again!
Expose yourself! 
Confess! 
Live! 

Life 
begins 
at
the 
end
of
your
comfort
zone.